This hope

Through this illness, struggle, and pain ,and through this fight I have this hope.

This hope of being able to find true happiness beyond this struggle.

This hope of being able to be stronger from all of this.

This hope of being able to get better, to fully recover.

This hope of being able to try new things and not be afraid.

This hope of being able to truly live not just survive.

This hope of being able to find myself in my struggle.

This hope of being able to reach my goals for the future.

Hope, Faith, Goals, Dreams. I want to make these things the focus of my life moving forward.

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Plans

image For the past six and half years my health has been constant downward spiral. It is hard to make everyday plans when you feel sick and exhausted everyday. It is hard to make a lot future plans when you no idea what your future might look like. This whole time I have been sick it has been hard to come up with a plan. Its been hard to firgure what tests to run, what doctor to see, and treatment plan. It is still hard to find treatment plans that will be effective and could possibly turns things around.

I have never had long term success with any treatment, so we have to keep asking questions and hope we come across some helpful answers. I want to come up with plan to help give me a better quality of life, and to decrease the number of treatments I have to have. I want to find to be able live my life that is more than just finding ways to survive each day. I guess I just have to faith that all the pieces will fall into place.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11